Estelle Shaya

Our RAs are mysterious figures. As their confused freshman underlings, we have a hard time understanding what thoughts cross their minds as they make critical decisions in regard to us. Perhaps most confounding is why the wall hangings our RAs created, meant to be the first things we saw entering our new homes, are such crap (with rare exceptions).

After an intensive half hour of research taking photos in Hank, Murray, Memorial, and North, I found a disturbing trend among RA art. The gold-standard work I came across was few and far in between. I knew a call to action was needed. If RAs really do care, we need a sign! Anyhow, here’s my evaluation of their bad art.

Plants:

What is the deal with plants, and more specifically, succulents? There were far too many hallways I came across with this as their “theme.” Not that most dorm decorations have anything to do with being a freshman or college life, but cacti take randomness to a new level. We’re in Nashville, so your RA can’t even make the claim that they’re trying to introduce you to the local flora and fauna. If anything, maybe they think you’re going to have a prickly start to the semester. That’s rough, when even the person paid to support you is subtly throwing shade.

Maps:

Now at first, you might think maps or postcards is a cute idea for a dorm. It means your RA cared enough about you to look up where you were from and make something personalized to welcome you to your first year of college. Well you thought wrong. If your RA really cared about you, they wouldn’t be posting private details of your hometown up on a door for anyone to see. Tear those wall hangings down and stay vigilant – any number of potential stalkers could have already seen your precious information.

Dragon Ball Z (I think):

Now here’s an example of actual talent. To all the floors with basic white-bread wall hangings (mine included), dream for a moment of a reality where your RA would actually care enough to painstakingly draw an anime character for every member of your floor. A further plus, this RA’s art gave me an excuse to stop writing and binge some of Dragon Ball Z in the name of research (can’t say it’s really my thing, but to each their own). Although other RAs certainly don’t care enough, the real question is why this one cares so much. I wouldn’t waste my talent on a bunch of bratty freshmen I wasn’t getting paid enough money to look after.

Pizza:

Pizza seems like a safe bet for a fun door decoration idea. But look just below the surface and there’s a frightening truth about how little this hall’s RA actually cares about their students. Dietary restrictions anyone? You don’t really expect me to believe that both those pizza slices are vegetarian, vegan, and gluten free. The only appropriate food door hanging is a stalk of broccoli, and even then, RAs need to be careful that they aren’t peer pressuring anyone into eating healthier. I’m here for the Freshman 15 after all. 

Old Town Road

I had to end on an uplifting note with what was by far my favorite wall hanging, “North House Road.” This is the epitome of RA art, something certain floors mentioned above should strive to be more like. Every time I walk down this hallway, the greatest song known to mankind inevitably gets stuck in my head. How could I ever ask for more?