To some, the feeling is familiar. You’re at a thing, it can be a party, a classroom, or even just with a group of friends. Somehow, it seems like everyone is loud and excited, vying to be in the middle of whatever it is that’s happening but for you, you’re content just hanging outside of it all.
One trait a lot of introverts share is being an observer. Rather than being in the middle of a group, you may find them on the outside, watching life go on instead of being the center of attention. Personally, I don’t think being a wallflower gets enough credit. A lot of attention goes to the person who’s at the center of it all (cough extroverts) and a lot of times they’re who ends up being remembered. And it’s understandable y’know. Why would anyone notice the person on the edge of everything?
I used to think How do people have the energy to be “on” like that all the time? How do people not get tired? Remaining and maintaining the attention of people always took more energy than it was worth for me. So instead, I’ve figured out how to lean into being on the outside of things. Being there, you’re able to see, hear, and pick up on things that those in the center can’t and honestly that can be more fun. And you don’t get drained in the process.
So next time you’re out, and a part of you feel like you should be talking just as loud or expending just as much energy as the people going crazy in the middle, maybe listen to the other part of you that just wants to relax and watch everything that goes down instead knowing that there are perks to being a wallflower.