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Archives for October 2020

MCL’s Top 5 Rainy Day Activities

October 13, 2020 by Paige Elliott

In honor of the rainy weekend, here are five great ways to make the most of the 2020 hurricane season!

1. Alternative slip-‘n-sliding on the Commons Lawn

The Vanderbilt administration would like you to believe that in order to slip-‘n-slide, you need equipment.  A rubber slide, a hose, swimsuits.  Don’t be fooled.  All you truly need to slip-‘n-slide is water and confidence.  That’s why alternative slip-‘n-sliding will be held on the Commons Lawn throughout the entire rainy season.  Any sort of board to ride on is prohibited; if you’re not a coward, you’ll throw yourself headfirst down the nearest grassy hill in the rain, and you’ll enjoy it.  (MyCommonsLife is not officially a sponsor of alternative slip-‘n-sliding, and is not responsible for any injuries that may occur.  Any attempts to hold MyCommonsLife responsible will be regarded as defamation and will result in a counterclaim.  We will take you for everything you have.  Sue at your own risk.)

2. Adopt a frog

As we all know, frogs of any species make excellent pets, delicacies, and friends.  They’re widely available, probably not endangered, probably not poisonous, and vaguely trendy.  And luckily, we at Vanderbilt have our own local pond, practically next door in Centennial Park!  Next time it rains, you should poke a few holes in, like, a tupperware or something and head straight down to the gloomy, twisting, and completely deserted paths of Centennial Park to catch yourself an amphibious friend.  Your RA will probably be fine with it; we all know they did worse when they were freshmen. And your little froggy buddy will no doubt be very happy to live out his days in a takeout container on your desk, sandwiched aesthetically between your possibly dead cacti and that Nalgene you keep meaning to wash out. There are absolutely no downsides to this activity!

3. Reenact that one scene from The Notebook

Y’know, the one where they’re out in a field and it’s raining, and the two main characters are wearing their thinnest, loosest clothing to strategically display their six-figure paychecks?  If you say you’ve never once in your life wanted to become Ryan Gosling, you’re lying.  And it’s so easy!  Unless you’re a stickler for authenticity (in which case good luck with the whole cheating-on-your-husband thing), all you really need to do to shake off those rainy-day blues is dig out a business-casual shirt or blouse and find someone who’s good at clinging and looking tragic.  It shouldn’t be too hard, we all have that one friend.

4. Cavort across the grasses and declare yourself the Rain Queene

Who couldst she be, that Wilde Apparition, spinning madly amidst the Tempeste?  It is the Rain Queene, alle yea peasants bow down!  She bringeth down storme and terror, lightning flashing in her terrible Visage, and yet in her passinge is the greater dread, her pale bony Doubling, the lady Drought.  All haile the Rain Queene, for her mercy and her horrors, the Thunder and the great creeping Thinges which settle amongste the dripping branches!  All haile the mistresse of the Darkened Sun!  Bow down!  Bow down!

5. Actually do your homework

Yeah, Jason, I’m talking to you.  Just get it done. Jeez.

Filed Under: Humor, MCL Top Five

CommonsCast Episode 58-October 14, 2020

October 13, 2020 by Zoe Yarbrough

Listen in as Dean of the Commons Melissa Gresalfi discusses the importance of keeping your grades in perspective, Zoe delivers this week’s Commons Calendar of events, and she has a great interview with fellow first-year student Jada Finley

Filed Under: Podcasts

MCL News Minute-October 14, 2020

October 13, 2020 by Olivia Gordon

Olivia tells you what you need to know about this week in a minute, with info about First Year Fridays and a cool robot building challenge at the W’ondry.

Filed Under: MCL News Minute, Video

The Top 5 Reasons You Need an Extension This Week

October 6, 2020 by Paige Elliott

1. Technical difficulties

Dear Professor,

I am writing to request an extension on the final project for this semester.  My paper and presentation were almost complete when my emotional support hedgehog, Spike Lee, chewed through my laptop and swallowed the hard drive, and then escaped into my building’s vent system.  All 23 of my floormates and two RAs have been helping me search for him for the past nine hours, but he is truly nowhere to be found.  Unfortunately, without the hard drive, I will have to start the project again from scratch, which will require a deadline extension of at least three weeks, barring Spike’s recapture.  Please let me know if this will be possible at your earliest convenience.

Sincerely,

Matthew B.

2. Illness or injury

Hello prfessor

I amsorry to bother you but i am writing to let you know that this morningg i tripped on th piwr th power cord for my fairy lights andfell down eight flights off stairs to the lonbby.  I broke bothh my arms and 16 vertebrae’s, and theyr saying they may have to replace all f my kidneys.  I am currantl currently typingthis with my nose from a hospitals bed while high off my veryhigh on codeine.  as such i would very appreciate an extension of 1-2 days on the essayay.  i have to go now they are going to operate onmy spleen.

very love, yuor student, laney

3. Prevented from preparing adequately

Hi, Professor,

I’m sorry to bother you, but would it be possible to request an extension on the test this afternoon?  Last night at about 4 am I was walking to the microwave to reheat my oolong when I stumbled and knocked into the wall.  My main study method for the sciences is to cut up the textbook pages and make a wall collage with concepts connected by red string like a TV conspiracy theorist (for liberal arts classes, of course, I use chicken wire and Munchie protein bars to represent the concepts in effigy), and so unfortunately I became entangled in the string and pulled all of my newspaper clippings and diagrams off the wall.  I stepped on at least three tacks and my study materials were blown out the open window.  In light of the circumstances, could I possibly have an extension?  I’ve collected most of my materials from across campus and the last few diagrams were reported near Blair, so I can get back to studying very soon.

Thank you,

Jason

4. Unavoidable conflicts

Hello, Professor:

I’m working remotely, and this week was a bit crazy.  I had to drive my youngest sister to four soccer tournaments, my middle brother is having an identity crisis after dropping out of med school, the dog ate all of my neighbors’ azaleas, my youngest brother burned down the doghouse, my parents both have the flu, and the baby will not stop screaming.  Would it be possible to grant me an extension on Essay #3?  Just until my noise-canceling headphones arrive and I settle the neighbors’ legal suit for property damage. And I should also figure out where my brother got the lighter fluid.  I’m so sorry for the inconvenience; I’m sure you’re very busy!  Please let me know what you decide.

Regards,

Anqi

5. Miscellaneous

Dear professor,

i am so hung over.  please

Filed Under: Humor, MCL Top Five

My Commons Watch: Nightcrawler

October 6, 2020 by Taehoon Kim

Welcome to My Commons Watch. In this section, we will be looking over entertainment in the digital form, be it a Netflix show or viral Youtube video. Of course, once you finish reading up each week’s topic, checking it out for yourself is absolutely mandatory! This week’s edition: Nightcrawler

Nightcrawler is a 2014 crime thriller directed by Dan Gilroy, with an uncomfortably realistic take on modern media culture. And I have to say, Jake Gyllenhaal, who plays Louis Bloom, gives one of his greatest performances on screen.

Louis Bloom is a sociopath. He lives and operates alone, down on his luck financially, and most certainly not making strides on the social scene. But one night, he stumbles upon the world of stringing, also known as night crawling. Night crawlers celebrate when a building burns. They make vacation plans when a family is killed. Because, when these tragedies happen, night crawlers are on the scene with a camera and a light, angling for the best shot to deliver to news stations. The more shocking the footage, the more bills in their pockets. Naturally, this career appeals to our lovely protagonist, who shows talent early on. As morbid as the job can be at times, Lou manages to take it even further.

SPOILERS!

Dan Gilroy’s directorial debut film had audiences, including myself, at the edge of our seats, and I practically fell off during the movie’s final act. Few films have filled me with so much suspense. So, what makes Nightcrawler so entertaining? Why do we enjoy watching a sociopath with no redeeming qualities or relatable human traits? First, we must learn about Lou’s sociopathy.

Lou’s dialogue is something particularly unique to this film. He rarely speaks about his feelings, and when he does, it is with sinister intentions that chill us to the bone. Every other time, however, Lou is citing facts, teaching other characters, and keeping every thing in concise, logical verbal packages. At no point do we feel frustrated or feel the pace of the movie slow down for Lou do navigate complex emotions. He has none. He continually takes the logical next step, whether it’s morally questionable or not, and he wins every time. As audience members, we take joy in watching Lou do what we wish we could. Emotionlessly knowing exactly what to do and taking what we want, when we want it.

Most importantly, we are shown that society rewards emotionless characters like Lou. The news station boss praises Lou for his gruesome recordings, and pays him handsomely for them. Viewership for the news broadcast even increases. It’s a clear commentary on the media culture we are all guilty of participating in, but it also creates a bridge between us and a sociopath like Lou. Maybe we all are sociopaths in some way, but we just don’t admit it to ourselves. And while entertaining our selfish desires are satisfying to watch at first, Lou eventually takes a dark turn that even we can’t follow.

Lou sits by while a family is shot and records the suspects. Lou captures footage of the bleeding family members without ever calling for help. Lou keeps the footage of the suspects to himself, and waits for the criminals to commit another crime. Even this, we can accept as an audience, even empathize. We all can appreciate an artist dedicated to his work. The moment this empathy stops, however, is when Lou delivers this line to his partner in crime: “What if my problem wasn’t that I don’t understand people, but that I don’t like them?”. Lou holds no emotional attachments to his partner, Rick, who stuck by Lou through his entire journey, and undoubtedly helped him succeed. We value our connections with people we’ve spent significant amounts of time with, and even the evilest movie villains have someone they trust. Lou holds none of these sentiments, and when he intentionally lets Rick get shot, we are woken up to his true emptiness.  

Nightcrawler puts us face to face with our less acknowledged, dark selves. Even now, 7 years after the film’s release, it’s message hits home.

Filed Under: Features

Squirrel Series part 2: To Cache or Not to Cache

October 6, 2020 by Anna Morgan

Between phrases such as “squirrel brained” and “he ain’t got the brains God gave a squirrel!” people throw a lot of shade on a squirrel’s intellect. Does the squirrel deserve this reputation, or does it actually deserve an apology??? This week’s installment in the squirrel series looks at how squirrels pick what nuts to cache. Future installments will further examine aspects of a squirrel and its caches.

TO CACHE OR NOT TO CACHE Multiple studies have found that squirrels more often finish eating white oak acorns than red oak acorns. Squirrels typically eat the entirety of the former, while eating closer to half of the latter; they bury the remaining red oak* half.

Many researchers attribute the difference in treatment of white versus red to the concentration of the acorns’ tannin. Tannins are sour proteins that are found in dry wines and in tanning leather. For several reasons, the squirrels prefer white oak acorns, which have lower tannin content. Over time, much of the tannin will have leached out of the red acorns, making for more desirable meals. Once some time has passed, the squirrels will return to their red acorns.

Other research suggests perishability plays a large role in caching, too. A 1996 paper featuring the Perishability Hypothesis attributes the difference in acorn treatment primarily to perishability instead of taste. White acorns are known to germinate soon after their autumn maturations, thus qualifying for a high perishability rating. Red acorns, on the other hand, remain dormant throughout the winter, waiting until spring to germinate. Therefore, they have low perishability. Researchers consistently found that squirrels cached more red than white. When the squirrels did cache white ones, they first chomped away the embryo of the acorn, keeping it from germinating in its time in the ground.

*Identifiers white oak acorn and red oak acorn here are sometimes abbreviated to white acorn or even white. It should be understood that when white acorn is said that does not mean the acorn is actually white.

So that’s that. It goes without saying that no one can be absolutely sure what goes through a squirrel’s mind. However, research so far described is leaning toward the side that the squirrel deserves an apology. Future investigation will provide further insight.

BE SURE TO READ NEXT WEEK’S INSTALLMENT IF YOU WANT TO BETTER UNDERSTAND A SQUIRREL’S CACHING PROCESS.

Mr Squirrel says feel free to comment below.

Filed Under: Features

CommonsCast Episode 57-October 7, 2020

October 6, 2020 by Zoe Yarbrough

In this episode Dean Gresalfi shares information about her Dean’s Dinners, Zoe has details on events you need to know about and she has a great interview with Vanderbilt Professor Adeana McNicholl.

Filed Under: Podcasts

MCL News Minute-October 7, 2020

October 6, 2020 by Olivia Gordon

Olivia spills the details on things happening around campus that affect your Commons Life, including free food at Donuts & Doreways and Free Friday before Vandy’s Saturday football games.

Filed Under: MCL News Minute, Video

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